Marty’s Snappy Endings to Religious Prayers!
Sunday, August 9, 2009 at 3:53PM Hold on to your socks if you’re wearing any, because here we go with...
Marty’s Snappy Endings to Religious Prayers!
---------------------
Our Father, who Art in Heaven.
Hey, God, when did you change your name to Art?
---------------------
Lord God Almighty,
You have brought us safely to the beginning of this day.
Now will you please turn the motherfucking water into diet Mountain Dew, already?
I’m groggy as fuck-all over here!
---------------------
Hail Mary, full of Grace.
Full of Grace? Hey, Mary, what are you, some kind of a freaking cannibal? Sheeesh!
---------------------
Eternal Father, I desire to rest in Your Heart this night.
And I pray it is filled with Budweiser, for without it I cannot sleep.
---------------------
To Thee do we cry,
poor banished children of Eve.
Eve Plumb? (Ha ha ha! I’m really cracking myself up over here!)
---------------------
I offer to You, my Lord, my every breath and heartbeat as a prayer of reparation.
But God, please keep your clammy mitts off my beer and diet Mountain Dew.
---------------------
Amen.
That means “goodbye” in Godspeak, motherfuckers. Sneeze you all later. Go in Peace or forever hold your cheese. Et tu spiiriiittt tu tu oh!
---------------------
Reader Comments (15)
TO AMEN !
To Amen!
TO AMEN...AND THE JESUS HOLE!
HAHAHA ! TO AMEN ! To full of GrAss ! TO BUTTWEISER ! ;D
AND THE JESUS wHOLE of grASS !
Never follow the lords ways... or you'll getting lost in the Jesus Hole !
full of grass ??? Did she go to the taxidermist instead of going to the hairdresser ?
(another use of the Jesus hole)
TO AMEN ! To full of GrAss ! TO BUTTWEISER ! ;D
AND TO THE TAXIDERMIST!
... Serious... Did you already saw ME in a hairdresser?!!! haha! look at my hair and laugh at me!! I look like an ostrich going out right from a butchery !
That's like the Marty's koala girl which smells eucalyptus in the morning ... you smell fresh grass when you fart ?
Is that what you mean when you say you want to die in the odour of sanctity ???
marsha, marsha, marsha!
The Jesus Hole is a f
part of your reality, my son.... a kind of paradise where the grass of mary turns to gross mary !Dear Jesus......send me a whore with eucalyptus pussy and i promise to stop being a drunk asshole......maybe!
Hey! I've got an idea... We may can create a welcome gift for every new commentator : A pussy smelling eucalyptus that you must to use instead the sugar with Absinthe!
Cheers !! All are most than Welcome !
LMAO! (At the post and all the comments!)