Hello and Welcome to Friday's Show!

Thank God it’s Friday and thank God I don’t have to work the dayshift today!

One again, genius artwork by resident artist, “Boris,” on the Home Page! It’s electric! Thanks, “Boris!”

I’ve got some good stuffed brewed up. We’ll have a “Hi Asshole,” this afternoon, I’m going to check the P.O. Box to see if there’s anything there and updates at Daily Photo, Condensed Gossip and fishwrap. Check back often, I’ll be posting the Daily Photo momentarily! Oh, and I’ve got a postcard from Oprah coming up here within the hour. Just check the red links on the Home Page, Homie’s!

Comments

[mrs5000]

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks "And get me a whisky you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee.

When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls "And get me another whisky you idiot". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee.

Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot's approach "I've asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I'll kick you".

The next moment, both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For someone who can't fly, you complain too much!"

[Heide]

That's a funny new home page photo you posted, Marty. An electric chair with a whoopee cushion!?!
Holy shit. That's beyond ironic. Who'd ever actually need to let out a fake fart, when in reality they would be shitting their pants off for what was to come....on their journey back to meet their maker, or rather Satan, if the train ride up was overbooked due to another glitch in the faulty reservation system. ("Oh, you asked for a King-size non-smoking Presidential suite in HEAVEN??...ahhh........let's see here Mr. Wombacher .......oh... that's strange.....we seem to have you down only for a 6X6 army cot janitor closet in chain-smoking HELL.......so we're sorry, it appears all other rooms are booked, but I'll tell you what....Let's see what I can do here. Just let me make a quick call over to the main headquarters at the Vatican and inquire if they have anything immediately available for you in purgatory......")

And of course, there's always the provincial last meal one might decide to enjoy......Smoked Kielbasa sausages with kraut with mexican beans and jalapenos. Yep. Damn straight. That's what I'd have.
Make my executioner have burning tears in his eyes....
;-)

[Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment!]

Whoopee! We're all gonna die!