Beer Frame

Common Taters

On MySpace and facebook, it’s kind of a common courtesy to comment back occasionally to people who are nice enough to leave a comment. I can’t do that here, because I’m too busy posting through the day before I go to work. But I read them all and really appreciate those of you that leave them.

So I thought once a week on my early Friday morning edition of Beer Frame, I’d comment back to some of you. So, beer in hand, here I go!

Comment on All About ME!
Thanks for adding the paper or plastic. By the way: Life is also a GAME.

Michelle R. Stein

Ha ha ha! That’s right, Michelle. You were the first person to start leaving comments here, Michelle. Thanks so much for all your support, it means a lot to me.

Home Page
Looking GREAT marty!!!

gina

Thanks, Gina! Gina has a recipe website, check it out here.

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
Looking good--great design and of course, there'll be lots of funny shit once it takes off! I'll look forward to visiting often!

Aaron Smith

Thanks Aaron, come as often as you like, there’s no cover charge, ever! Unless you’re Tom!

Marty's Guestbook
So this is NYC! All i can say is ShamfuckingWow! Is there an open bar? Are you in your dressing room snorting coke with Hollywood Starlets? Who do i see to get my parking validated?

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

My cocaine days are long gone, Professor, these days I stick to the legal speedball of diet Mountain Dew and Budweiser. About the parking validation, see Oprah, she gives the cars away, she can fucking validate them as well!

Comment on Baby Needs Diapers Daily Photo
HHAHHAHHA!

zemmiwinkadinkledoo

Glad you got a chuckle out of that, Zemmidoodles!

Marty's Guestbook
Good show! I especially liked your trip to Central Park!

DogNose

Thanks, DogNose! You’re coming out here in a week, right?

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
I'm diggin it

mit

Thanks, Mit, nice shovel!

Comment on Baby Needs Diapers Daily Photo
Aisle 3...Papa needs a sixpack and a bag of cheetos!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

May I suggest Budweiser and some sleazy cheese to go with those Cheetos, Professor?

Comment on Baby Needs Diapers Daily Photo
Awesome -- I love shit like this. "My" WalMart has an aisle sign that reads "Cookies, Beans ..." but that's only wrong diet-wise.

Slim Volume

That’s very wrong, Slimbo! Beans belong far away from cookies!

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
Congratulations on today's launch and see you in NYC soon!

Transparency

Thanks, Michael, look forward to meeting you!

Marty's Guestbook
It's a long way from Peoria, Marty. Congratulations. Best, Dick.

Dick Stolley

Thanks Dick, come back to New York sometime and we can have lunch and make fun of Mike Neill behind his back.

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
Send you panties, stuff like that?

Slim Volume

You’re scaring me, Slim, and that’s tough to do!

Comment on Baby Needs Diapers Daily Photo
The Depends aisle is located right behind it.

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

Ha ha ha! Good one, Michelle! Oops, I crapped my pants!

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
Great job on the Photoblog!! By the way, “The Other Side of Summer" is one of my favorite songs. I need to add it to my iPod. Thanks for reminding me.

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

It’s one of my favorites too, Michelle. I love that Imagine line in it, great lyric!

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
I enjoy these NYC tours, it really does put me there, and the commentary is always so sentimental. Central reminds me of Piedmont Park in Atlanta back in my heyday. Except it's Central Park and has 9,000 times more character.

Slim Volume

And over 9,000 characters, Slim. Definitely not a Twittered park!

Comment on One of the first stories about fishwrap. News
When I come to visit will you please take me to the "Ukrainian bar in the East Village?”

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

By all means, Michelle! And we’ll drink a toast to the guy who wrote that article, Bill Bell. One of the craziest, funniest and original guys I have ever met. If you’re reading this Mike Neill, thanks for introducing me to him. This beer’s for you, Bill. And the next six as well!

Comment on Baby Needs Diapers Daily Photo
I saw a sign outside a pizzeria (Fifth Avenue somewhere in the 30s, I think) that said: Pizza to Go in Rear.

MikeN

Ha ha ha! I woke up in that condition one day.

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
Marty, Love it. And I for one plan on sending you lots of JUNK mail. Hey If we do send you oversized packages,you o.k. w/that? Like refrigerators? This is very exciting and inspiring. Xo Ms CosMod

Thanks, Ms CosMod! And a refrigerator would be great, I love to play in refrigerator boxes! xo Marty.

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
feel like i was there with you...but whats that smell?:)

colleen caffeine

Hey Colleen, I wish you would’ve been there! And the smell was from that dirty mustard bottle!

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
i'm going to send you all of my bills. and an occasional larry, for good measure.

biff

An occasional Larry? Ha ha ha! You still gots it Bifferoonie!

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
coffee and a muffin? the only thing THAT's going to stimulate is my colon!

biff

You’re killing me over here, Biff. Here, you need this. rimshot.

Comment on What if Rapper Lil Wayne Wrote Cartoon Captions for the New Yorker? fishwrap
HAHHAHHAHHHAHHAA! Muthafucka!

zemmiwinkadinkledoo

That shit is RUFF, son!

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
Nice stroll!If you need help with that beer in your fridge, let me know...

MissKlaatu

I never need any help with it, MissKlaatu, but you’re more than welcome to it!

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
Bravo Marty, bravo.

tiefighter25

Ever since Bravo started airing commercials, it sucks monkey lungs! (Thanks tiefighter25.)

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
HELLLOOOOOO?!?!??I was wondering... what sort of point are you trying to make?HAHAAA!!I like this a lot, Marty. And 100% Tom-Free!Marty

Marty (Louisville)

HELLLLLOOOO!!! I believe the point is my head. And yes, it’s Tom-free. I haven’t had an error since I’ve been here!

Comment on Tuesday, May 5th, 2009 Condensed Gossip
Love the Rihanna outfit. LOL

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

Yeah, she got all puffy with it!

Comment on Monday, May 4th, 2009 Condensed Gossip
You got anything on Jazzy and Juicy?

Marty (Louisville)

God, I hope not, Marty! I’d hate to see those little fuckers condensed.

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
Hey Martissimo, the new website looks frickin' great! It's everything I expected and more. I'll spread the word to both of my friends about it!

Jason Childress

Thanks Jason, I really appreciate the word of mouth. And here’s a plug-ola for Jason’s great new book, Mediocrates. Buy several copies, they make great Mother’s Day gifts!

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
Just read your FAQ's. You are mighty negative. Probably because you live in a large stinking city. Take some time to relax

Jane in Key West

Okay Jane, at your insistance I’ll have another beer.

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
Great photos, Marty!Good luck with that swine flu you picked up from that subway wall...looks like more than the words of the prophets on THAT one!I'll drink a beer in honor of the ol' P&G.

Marty (Louisville)

Ha ha ha! Liked the Simon and Garfunkel reference, Marty! And yes, cheers to the P&G a great dive bar. They’ll probably put a fucking Starbucks there.

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
thought it was great. loved the travelogue. you somehow made the subway more inviting.

tom murray

Thanks Tom, glad you enjoyed the trip. That’s not the first trip we’ve taken together, and no I’m not talking about acid. Well...maybe I am!

Comment on fishwrap magazine Product
If you sell back issues of fishwrap- don't forget to send me my 10%

LN

The check’s in the mail, LN! And thanks for not making a cruel face transplant joke over here. I’m trying to keep this fucking place classy.

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
Lookin' good Marty. I mean the Web site. You ain't getting any prettier.

DeWayne

Thanks, DeWayne. And yes, that’s sad but true!

Comment on One of the first stories about fishwrap. News
Thanks to you Marty, I have decided to quit my job as a city bus driver and have enrolled in the University of Wisconsin to major in piano moving 101. I hear that pays a little more than regular funiture moving ...

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Stick with me, Professor and you’ll be a homeless crack addict in no time!

Comment on Central Park Photoblog
I can almost smell the urine from here! One thing about urine...it smells the same in every city of the world! I especially like the imagine photo...a nice tribute to Frank Zappa's Help i'm a rock! Imagine that they would freak ...

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Ah yes, I love the smell of urine in the morning, Professor! It smells like...piss.

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
You'll have to thank your pal Jason for mentioning your site on Lulu.I love your FAQs, especially 'what is the time?' and 'what is life?' I'm a mad Brit who might just stalk you...

Carol Townsend

Hey Carol, is that you under the futon? Come on out and have a beer with me! And bring Pete with you.

Comment on Hello! Daily Post
Just stopping by to check out the new "digs".Hope to contribute some smartassery to the place."Boris"

"Boris"

Hey “Boris,” I know you’ve been busy, but what this place needs is a LOT of your smartassery!

Comment on Little Graydon fishwrap
What's up with his hair?????

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

I hear you Michelle! And it’s not only up, it’s down, around and all over the place!

Comment on Tuesday, May 5th, 2009 Condensed Gossip
Where would we be without the big O...., Oprah of course!

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

Ha ha ha! And she sure is big these days!

Comment on A review in my hometown paper. News
As Sean Connery once said in some dogshit movie..."You're the man, now dog!"

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Check this out, Professor! (Hat tip to tiefighter25.)

Comment on Monday, May 4th, 2009 Condensed Gossip
Dude. Love the website but dont fuck with Angel, Britney. That shit aint funny. Joey Delgado

Joey D

Maybe you’re right, Joey, look what happened to K-Fed!

Comment on And Now...Lunch! Daily Post
garden of speedin'! HA HA HA! you still got it, marty!p.s. who is that dude walking next to the old guy? is it moby? or is it ahmet zappa with a beard? speaking of which, i wonder what selma blair's up ...

biff

Thanks Bifferoonie! Your Ahmet Zappa comment cracked me up! You still gots it too!

Comment on Tuesday, May 5th, 2009 Condensed Gossip
if oprah had cheese nips, she'd never leave the house!

biff

Instead she’s got Steadman, that’s why she has to leave the house, to pay his bills!

Comment on The fishwrap Comparison fishwrap
she's got diamonds on her nipples! hey, isn't that a song by kenny chesney?

biff

Ha ha ha! There goes rhymin’ Bifferoonie!

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
Big site Marty. I disagree about Col. Sanders. You were too young when we moved from Kentucky.

Terry

Just like a big sister to start an arguement on my website! I’m telling mom!

Posted Marty's Guestbook Marty's Guestbook
Wha diz awl thissshit?

macbruum

For schnizzle, me dizzle.

Comment on Snaxi Daily Photo
Maxi pads could do the same shit! I'd rather ride in a maxi than a snaxi!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Ha ha ha! Good one, Professor!

Comment on Beer Frame Daily Post
"Hey, Richie! Here comes the sun!" I love it. Reminds me of eating chocolate fudge/hashish at a party and it just kicking in and as everybody was starting to leave. Then I got one of those seven hour hard-ons they talk about ...

Ivor

Thanks for stopping by Ivor, but please, point that thing somewhere else, it’s giving me the jitters!

Comment on Website of the Week fishwrap
Marty, what do you think of this? Of the recent ones, I personally like "alone" and "silence."

Hania

It’s hilarious, Hania! I’m going to feature it in two weeks. Thanks for sending it my way! I’ll give you a hat tip when it runs (like that’s a big fucking deal!)

Comment on Swiny Dancer Daily Photo
it ain't kosher to blow hogs!

biff

Oink-vey, Biff, oink-vey!

Comment on Noodling Around fishwrap
Pasta? Fuggetaboudit.

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

It’s forgotten already, those guys are a bunch of noodle-heads.

Comment on So I'm Doomed Daily Post
GO BROWNS!

biff

GO BROWNS!

Comment on Crossbreeding Daily Post
And they claim that space aliens don't really exist!

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

They’re the same people who claim if you drink every night you’re an alcoholic! Damn those people.

Comment on So I'm Doomed Daily Post
Go Griefs! Oh, I mean Chiefs.

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

Ha ha ha! Good one, Michelle.

Comment on Daily Video Daily Post
That is great, thank you for sharing this. I had not heard of the book.

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

It’s a great book Michelle, I’ve read it about a bazillion times.

Comment on And Now...Lunch! Daily Post
Ewwwwwwww

Michelle Ruffin-Stein

It was better than it looked, I promise!

Comment on Six Jolly Things Daily Post
where's oprah?

biff

She’s eating Cheese Nips.

Comment on Website of the Week fishwrap
A classic, Marty!

Marty (Louisville)

It’s a great site, isn’t it? I don’t know where they get all those photos.

Comment on Crossbreeding Daily Post
Does that mean Minnie Driver's Indian name is Puny Leadfoot?

tiefighter25

Ha ha ha! You smoking peace pipe, tiefighter25?

Comment on Daily Video Daily Post
First Asshole on the site to post a comment, "First!"

tiefighter25

Now we know who’s on first. I’ll alert Abbott and Costello.

Comment on Daily Video Daily Post
I'm the second asshole to comment but believe me thai stick25 that if we were in a contest of assholes i would win hands down! I sill have that record jacket! The good ole days!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

I hear you Professor, to the good ole days!

Comment on Beer Frame Daily Post
That's right Marty! I'm lurking about here somewhere, with a beer in my hand! Don't you listen to those 12 stepper's! Drinking is the only way to survive in this cesspool...no...not your website...the world!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Cheers to that, Professor!

Comment on Beer Frame Daily Post
Because, I too, love Vince and his ShamWow. ShaWOW remix!

Joey D

Ha ha ha! Great video, Joey, thanks for sending it!

Comment on Elvis Presley is a Wormfeast Product
I used to buy cocaine from a bartender downtown that sold $20.00 bags from behind the bar with this as their "brandname" stamped on the glassine. You’re FAMOUS.

Joey D

Hey Joey, Human Resources just called and they want to see you. Something about a drug test. Don’t forget to take your PDR, so you won’t fail.

Comment on You Got Any Gum? Daily Post
Being hard of hearing, I might think you said, "I've got a gun!" and hand you my wallet.

MikeN

Huh?

Comment on Beer Frame Daily Post
holla!i'll bet it'd be hard to holla if a hooker bit your tongue off.

biff

He’d holla, “ShamOW!

Comment on ROFLMAO!!! Daily Photo
i think i made out with that mannequin in a bar once.

biff

I felt her up once. Next time you come out here, I’ll hook you up with her, Biff. She’s easy, like Sunday morning!

Comment on You Got Any Gum? Daily Post
She had gum. Did she give you some gum? If all the gum people are girls, I will be suspicious of your motives.

Terry

Terry, you’ve known me my whole life, surely you know by now to be suspicious of ALL my motives!

Comment on Take Two Daily Post
I have just started a new band called the diamond woo hoo's thanks to biff! a fine name indeed!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Is Biff in the band?

Comment on Crossbreeding Daily Post

Aw Fuck.......That made me laugh!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Glad you got a larf out of that, Professor!

Comment on Good Morning Daily Post
Nice tongue motherfucker! I'll bet you are very popular with the over fifty female set! That's what you were going for here.....right? You cunt hound!

Professor Dungpie, Fountainhead of Enlightenment

Ha ha ha! A perfect comment to end with!

Well, that’s that! Thanks for all the comments and stopping by here, everybody! I hope to see and hear from all of you in the future! Happy weekend! Cheers,

Marty.

Comments

[biff]

i'm not IN the band, i'm WITH the band! and the mannequin, of course.